(Written: 8-27-08)
It is presently 4:39 in Los Angeles, 6:39 in Houston, 7:39 in Washington D.C., 1:39 a.m. in Frankfurt Germany, and 2:39 a.m. in Cairo, Egypt the final destination. This marks my journey starting at 1a.m. local Los Angeles time on Tuesday the 26th. I am currently somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean on my way to Frankfurt where 28 of the 30 Middle East Studies Program participants will board our connecting flight to Egypt where we are set to arrive at 2p.m. on Wednesday afternoon. These are the facts. Now for the real journey…
It’s been a whirlwind preparation this last week double checking lists, shopping, and making serious efforts to pack light (God seriously tapped his sense of humor when he created me with a love for travel considering my Packing Personality!). The arrival of my nephew, making me a first time aunt, added to the sweep of chaos but in a beautiful heart-warming way I can’t wait to come back and kiss his chubby cheeks!…
With this glimpse of scattered preparations you may imagine my increasing difficulty to engage emotionally with the imminent reality of moving to a foreign country for the next 3 ½ months. I had processed so much for so long that it all began to blur and numb until a divine encounter/wake-up call came on Monday night (right before I left). For some months I’ve been on the emailing list of a woman named Cindy who lives with her husband in Israel where they live out a passion for the people, the land, and for hearts to experience the tender touch of Jesus. As it turns out they were speaking on Monday at a location near where I live. As they shared authentically about their experiences the Lord reminded me what this whole experience is about for me. Yes, it is a great opportunity. Yes, this is the best time of my life to take off for a foreign country for 3 months. Yes, it fits perfectly with my major. All this and more is true of this experience I am embarking on but that is not enough to set my heart fully to rest. The truth however is enough for me to say, “Ok, Lord! Let’s do this!”
For whatever God-given reasons I am drawn to these places, people, and cultures and my going has only ever been about his agenda not mine. For me to be a clear pitcher – a vessel for his joy and captivating personality and promises to pour out and fill the people I meet making them hungry for the living water he offers…I am most alive as he pours through me. When it stops being about what I’m getting out of any situation and becomes about me engaging in the life around me without fear then I am alive not merely living. This is in no way a permission slip to be unwise or culturally insensitive but oh how the pressure lifts when I remember I’m on God’s plan and that I don’t have to “make” (as if I could!) this experience any grand romanticized adventure. For me to effervescently and joyfully live!
I am forever grateful for this redirection of my focus. For the first time in months my heart is at peace about why I’m going. Why I’m leaving comfort, stability, friends, family. What’s it all for? For his kingdom to be more fully realized as I allow myself to be impacted by his image manifest in the people of the Middle East and in my willingness to let go of “self” and let Him move me into position and flow through me.
So here I am sitting in one of the middle seats a row of four on a Lufthansa plane ready for what comes next because it is not about me but about being willing to accept the gift the Lord has given of allowing me to intersect with a new circle of people loved and delighted in by him.
Here is where it physically begins but I know that all this was set in motion long before I even thought it might be a “good idea."
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